Resisting the Spirit of Despair — A Prayer of Deliverance

push back “We are experiencing trouble on every side, but are not crushed; we are perplexed, but not driven to despair; we are persecuted, but not abandoned; we are knocked down, but not destroyed…” (2 Corinthians 4:8-9 NET)

My prayer today is for those whose trials of life seem like more than you can endure. I understand fully what it is like to be stressed easily. I’m a quiet-natured person who tends to hold in my feelings to the boiling point. On the outside I am cool as a cucumber but inwardly, my cares and worries and stress can be chewing holes in my soul. Then, at the least convenient time possible, I’ve been known to show my vulnerability. Our mouths eventually betray us if we are focused on the negative or if our mentality is one of despair!

Our only defense is God’s Word, and our only righteous boldness is through the Holy Spirit. But that isn’t bad…that’s good in a FOOLPROOF way! When our defense is coming from God and not our own at-times weak abilities, we don’t have to wonder whether we are going to survive. God, our strength and the One Who goes before us in battle, will meet the enemy first and He will wave the victory banner right in Satan’s face. Take a deep breath, and pray with me. We are about to enter into a state of rest–spiritually, mentally, physically, and emotionally too.

Father, we come to You today asking You to throw up a shield that guards our speech from the ears of the enemy. We are hearing the taunts and suggestions and mockings of the devil, who would try to drown out Your voice…but Jesus said, “My sheep hear my voice and another they will not follow.” He didn’t say we would never hear other voices, but He did say that we would recognize and follow HIS. We magnify You today and tune our ears to listen for Your guidance. We are determined that our speech will not betray us and give the enemy a foothold. May only You hear our distress call and not the devourer…we know You stand ready to rescue Your children!

Help us to become glass-half-full people instead of glass-half-empty! Help us to crave Your Word and to dig in to its strength when we are hit headlong with bad circumstances. We realize that it takes no effort whatsoever to become obsessed with bitter, jaded, selfish, negative thoughts…but we are followers of Christ. Therefore, we have the MIND of Christ, and for that reason, we have a choice. We plead the blood of Jesus over our mind, will, and emotions.

When the devil shows us the bad, help us instead to focus on ways in which we are blessed. When he tells us that our circumstances are permanent and that we are trapped with no way to ever be happy again, remind us that to everything there is a season. We can even come to understand, as Paul, that what we are wrestling now are “light and momentary afflictions” in light of eternity. When we are physically feeling too weary and whipped to put up a fight, send Your ministering spirits to aid and strengthen us. We can trust You. Help us not to be angry and resentful for the season we find ourselves in at this time…and if anger and resentment must be felt, may we turn those emotions into prayer bombs launched against darkness. The origin of trouble is in the spirit realm; help us to stop warring against people, when these battles must be fought on a different battleground.

Father, help us to gird up our minds and to stop courting those things which invite depression and despair. Give us a distaste for movies, music, even news channels or foods that tamper with our state of well-being. Make us aware of what pushes our anxiety buttons, and give us the good sense to walk away from drama every time it tries to let itself into our lives. Curb our appetite for over-stimulation, and teach us to live in simplicity once again. May we value quiet time with You. May we learn to politely say NO to the world’s endless list of favors. Help us to learn from Solomon’s experience when he summed all that chasing after worthless things up to just that–worthless, meaningless pursuits. Help us to stick with fearing You and keeping Your commandments. Help us to stick to loving You first, wholeheartedly, then loving others as ourselves. There is no sorrow attached to the blessings You give us. Your blessings make us rich in ways money can and cannot buy.

Today we cast our burdens upon You, because You care for us. Remind us of that. When we are tempted to dig our burdens back out of the heap and take them home, rebuke us! Thank you for fresh mercy for today, for grace to cover our shame, and for Your Word which is the winning argument to every accusation of our enemy. Thank You for Your joy…the joy of our salvation, the joy which is our strength. Thank You for Your joy even on days we don’t particularly feel happy and satisfied! Thank You for a spirit of laughter to overtake us and wash away the heaviness in our hearts. Medicate us with laughter and lightheartedness as we stretch toward Your light and away from the darkness of our circumstances. Prepare that table for us in the presence of our enemies…so that the enemy is scratching his head saying, “Right in the middle of my worst attack, they’re having a joyous feast???”

We submit to You and in doing so, we make our lives a very inhospitable place for the enemy to camp out. Instead of running toward us, he runs away. The heat of having to hear us quote the Word is more than the spirits of wickedness want to expose themselves to. It reminds them of their own despair in the very near future!

Father, we lift our hands to heaven and receive Your strength. We are that tree in Psalm 1, deeply rooted by the river of water, bearing fruit, covered in leaves, strong, healthy, thriving, fixed, and stable. We do not stand in the way of sinners, nor sit in the seat of the scornful! We toss out sarcasm and carnality and instead we delight in You and what Your Word says. Our circumstances will NOT dictate our level of thankfulness and peace. When the circumstances are resistant or slow to change, You will work on our hearts instead…so that we can say that we are content no matter what state we’re in. When we can say that, nothing can move us out of our center of peace! In Jesus’ name, amen.

Post-It Notes of Remembrance

My mind today is on my friend Cathy, who was one of the bravest and most stubbornly faith-filled women I’ve ever known. Cathy may have left here sooner than those of us who loved her would’ve allowed…but her short life was not shadowed over with a spirit of grumbling and complaining. She had a thing about Post-it notes, and she didn’t care one bit to litter her beautiful home with them. Scriptures, prayer requests, blessings to give thanks for, Cathy would have notes on mirrors, door frames, refrigerator, walls…wherever they’d stick. They were her deliberate effort to maintain a grateful heart, right thoughts in her memory and on her lips. It worked. I watched a woman fighting for her life who made room for jubilant thanksgiving and praise of her God, and it humbled me. It made my petty groanings seem a lot less significant when she’d say of her own major obstacles, “Hardly nothing.” I’m trying to get a little less stingy with my Post-it notes; and because her friendship is one of those blessings I’m honored to remember, she is getting her own note on my wall. Today’s devotional doesn’t start out on a sad note at all…I’m just integrating a bit of very important nostalgia to support the idea of remembering one’s blessings.

The reason why God established the feast days for the children of Israel is to help them remember. You might ask, “How could anyone forget miracles like watching the parting of the Red Sea…or the deliverance from the bondage of Egypt…or the passing by of the angel of death?” Don’t be too quick to judge! If you do not consciously make room in your life for thanksgiving, celebration, and remembrance, you too will forget your miracles when faced with another mountain. Why, we do it all the time…but for the grace of God and the Holy Spirit jogging our memory, we’d become plumb full of ingratitude, forgetfulness, complaining, wishing for what we don’t already have, bitterly living in the past, coveting other people’s blessings.

You are looking at a bill in this morning’s mail that you have no earthly idea how you’ll pay…but shift your focus back to the last time God sent provision right when you needed it. The medical report the doctor’s office just gave you is not at all what you were wanting to hear…but don’t be overwhelmed by today’s trouble when there’s a memory of a previous healing begging to be unlocked. It’s practically screaming through the soundproof glass, “Wait! Wait, you forgot all about ME! Let me out of here and let’s talk!” Shut off the distresses of the moment, right now. If but only in your mind, place them in a tucker tote and put them in a corner out of your way. You can still deal with them, but for the moment, set them aside. It sounds elementary I know, but please don’t be insulted by the simplicity of what I’m going to suggest next–I’m not downplaying your serious needs. Get a piece of paper and begin to list some things from the past which God did for you “in the nick of time.” Add to that list the blessings you already have. You might have to press through pain to get there, but list what’s good. If your left leg’s hurting, praise Him that your right leg isn’t.

There’s an old hymn that says “I can take you to the time, I can take you to the place, where the Lord saved me, by His wonderful grace.” A major weapon of spiritual warfare is that determination to remember the victories. Maybe you don’t remember the exact date or place when something happened…write it down anyway. It will be the testimony that begins with, “There was that time when______.” It will be no less powerful! God’s not like an angry spouse who’s upset that you forgot the anniversary…His reasoning for you setting that time to remember is more for YOUR benefit than His. Anyway, make that list. If you know specific days on the calendar, find some way to commemorate them. Jot them in the margins of your Bible, or Post-it notes on the cork board, whatever. We mark everything else on our calendar from mortgage due dates to doctor appointments…make some room for good things! Whenever May 22 rolls around again and you’ve got even a small story of thankfulness that coincides with that date, make an all-out celebration of it. Today, you might say to others, marks 17 years since the doctor gave me six months to live! Next Thursday marks 2 years when God saved us from losing our business. Or, I’ll always rejoice in April because that’s when I got a letter of acceptance to a university that by all human reasoning, I shouldn’t have been able to attend. Or, it was on a New Year’s Eve 30 years ago when such-and-such relative tried to take his own life, but God spared him. I can’t tell your stories because I don’t know them all, but if you’ll sweep today’s troubling circumstances to the side for just a bit, you have some incredible victories you NEED to relive. You need the strength from those memories to inspire you to forge ahead in today’s trials.

Yes, you need to make a big deal of these things. Who cares if someone else doesn’t want to have a party with you? You have a party with God! Recently, Dana and I started a journal of blessings. Oh, we might not post to it every day, but we’ve gotten into the practice of talking about blessings at night before we go to sleep, and he has me jot them down. Sometimes I go back through and read a few entries. It might be a major healing, or it might be thanks that God helped me to change a faucet under our sink without it leaking. On either end of the wow spectrum, these blessings are worth remembering and giving thanks for all over again!

What has He done for YOU–past or present–that’s worth a celebration? It’s time to put on the garment of praise and ditch that spirit of heaviness! Grab the calendar, grab the pad of sticky notes, and encourage yourself in the Lord. He’s worthy of praise, and His loving kindness is so worth the remembrance.

“Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies; Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle’s.” –Psalm 103:2-5

That Your Prayers Be Not Hindered

“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For,“Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” — 1 Peter 3:1-12

I want to interject early on, that there is a difference between medical conditions which trigger certain behaviors, and spiritual conditions. When someone is (or should be) under medical treatment and/or medications for such conditions, I would never advise you to stop treatment or counseling. In fact, I beg of you to get checked out if you suspect you’re dealing with bipolar, depression, PTSD, or any other mental health issue that might make it easy for you to mistreat others. The difference is, medication can help with a physical/mental condition–there is no shame in needing it–but if your problem is spiritual, you cannot medicate away a spiritual problem! May all of us transparent with ourselves enough to know when sin is the root cause of our bad behavior–and may we aggressively do the work to get it out of our lives.

I also want to note that, this article can’t possibly take into account every single home’s unique issues. I do want to, however, talk about just a few of them. If these don’t touch on the particular problems, causes, and conditions in your own home, just know that I’m trying to touch a small area in a very broad issue. Please, if you’re having problems, don’t just take my small blog post as an all-inclusive approach to dealing with them. Consult with a qualified marriage counselor, pastor, mental health advisor, someone who can get into the finer points of your particular crisis.

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It’s not often that I start a devotional out with such a long passage of Scripture, but to condense this very important passage would not do any justice to the teaching topic I’m addressing this morning: cruelty in the home, most notably, spousal abuse.

There aren’t many instances in Scripture where spousal abuse is recorded; yet, treating one’s family well–including (and especially) the husband or wife–is a recurring theme throughout the Scriptures. It’s important to God. Being kind to one’s mate should be a given, right? Yes, it should be. There are some things God shouldn’t have to come right out and get elementary about, and yet… He had to spell out that we not have sex with animals, with our parents/kids/near kin, etc. If you think that mankind is inherently good, well, think again. The human heart, without God shaping it and molding it, is desperately wicked. When mapping out a plan for godly living, yes, He got very specific. He knew there would be a few delinquents in the bunch who might come back later and say, “Well, no one ever told ME that a person’s not supposed to do that!”

A Double Life

A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. James 1:8, 19-20

You cannot be cruel in your home and it not affect your life outside your home. I knew of a man once whom everyone in the general public loved. He was very charismatic, very accommodating to others. He was the “open doors, help little old ladies across the street” kind of guy. He was well respected in the business world and in the political realm; yet there was an elephant in the room. When he went home at night, he left the nice-man suit in his car in the garage, and put on the monster costume. He was a verbal abuser to his entire family, but especially to his wife. It would eventually come out that on occasions he got physical with her, too. She remained with him until her children were grown, reasoning within herself that it was ok, so long as he didn’t physically harm the kids. Then, one day she and his children were well out of harm’s way, and everyone was shocked. They couldn’t figure out what on earth would break up such a happy home. Then, slowly, the stories begin to emerge about what was actually going on in that home. The wife would confide, the kids would confide; eventually, what was such a carefully-guarded secret was all over the place.

If that weren’t a sad enough note to end this little story on, the man didn’t just go back to business-as-usual in his outside life. With no one at home to take his frustrations out on, the monster costume was occasionally worn to work and out in the community under his clothes. His stellar reputation went south, and though he was a man of means, he lost everything of true value. Eventually even his financial prosperity proved to be tainted by the cruelty in his heart.

Abuse Isn’t Always Covert

Flip the situation and I’ll tell you of another. I used to know a married couple that I absolutely hated running into. They were friends of ours, and I didn’t dislike them, per se. I was just always left deeply uncomfortable by the way the wife continually, and in every conversation, insulted her husband to us…right in front of him! She would go on and on about foolish choices he made, and how if he’d only have listened to her, he wouldn’t have done them…or how he always did this wrong, or always failed in that area. Her whole discussion would always seem to center on how superior she was to him in every way. I could tell this man was resentful and deeply ashamed of what she was doing, and yet, the climate never seemed to change. They had a rocky, on-again, off-again relationship. It always felt good whenever we were able to finagle ourselves away from them! Was that spousal abuse? It absolutely was!

No Place for Abuse in a Christian Home!

Why am I sharing this in a devotional? Because I see it, shamefully so, in Christian homes and not just in the homes of nonbelievers. And yes, those stories abound as well of women who are abusers in the home. Their outcomes are no better than this man’s. And this situation I’ve shared with you is a secular story. You’re seeing ones like it on the news nearly daily now. There are countless big-time athletes and actors and celebrities who’ve lost their status because their abusive characters outside the workplace cause their employers to view them as a public relations risk. No one wants to be associated with a bully or a thug, or even a jerk! Even some of the best-looking actors in Hollywood have completely lost their heartthrob status when it came out that they were abusers of their spouses and families.

I wonder–knowing what an outspoken man Peter was–how and when he eventually came to the place in his walk with God where these teachings had lodged within his own heart! Peter–the same man who wrote the above passage is the same hot-head who cut off the high priest’s servant’s ear in the Garden of Gethsemane. He’s the same fellow who denied Jesus three times, and other major debacles of character. Yet, he apparently at least eventually got the revelation that God values self-control in a man (and a woman). Jesus even showed up at his house at one point to heal Peter’s mother-in-law of a fever, and she rose up afterwards and ministered to them. A man who has relationship issues wouldn’t call Jesus to his home to heal one of his in-laws! He’d probably do anything that he could to keep Jesus from entering his home, for fear that Jesus would sense a spirit of offense there. Peter’s writings here would indicate that, at least in time, he understood the necessity of one’s horizontal relationships’ being in harmony to positively open up the VERTICAL relationship with God.

I’m not writing this devotional to try to shame men into becoming walked-on wimps, and I’m not writing it to tell women that they have no voice and should just be door mats to their husbands. I’m writing it to urge you to get your houses in order…because how you treat your family matters to God. You will be judged for it. The fruitfulness of your hopes, dreams, and prayers depends on it, too. If you don’t particularly like being successful, being thought well of, being blessed, being whole in mind and body, then just ignore everything I’ve said…BUT! If you do want to have a blessed, prosperous life where everything doesn’t go to pieces, then you need to respect the conditions for blessing that God has set forth in His Word.

Common Excuses We Use Not to Change

It’s just the way I am. I inherited this temper. So lame! This is the laziest excuse to let one’s emotions run the show. You are right about one thing…without God’s help, you really can’t change. And if you inherited a short fuse, stop bragging about it! It’s not something to be proud of. If you have anger issues or a personality trait that is endangering the welfare of your family, be man or woman enough to admit it before God and before a qualified marriage counselor. Don’t wait until the damage is beyond repair. You may not feel that bad about it now, but at some point in time, you will reap some painful things for the pain you inflict on others.
It’s his/her fault that I lose it. My spouse sets me off with that mouth! While it’s true, our spouses can lend to the overall problem, it is still up to you to control your own spirit! Temporarily distance yourself if you have to, rather than engaging so heatedly into discussions that you wind up saying and doing regretful things. Back off. Take a walk. Better yet, pray and get into God’s Word. Take the initiative to arrange for pastoral and qualified family counseling if you have these types of issues. Whatever you do, don’t let that volcano of hate and anger spew into your home!
He/she knows I really don’t mean it. We always cool off eventually. I can promise you this: when you say hurtful things to your children or spouse, they play over and over like a broken record long after the argument is over. Don’t be the cause of your family having to deal with the sin of unforgiveness through repeated abuse on your part! Nothing good can come of you causing your spouse and kids to develop hard, callous hearts. It will tell on you, eventually.
As long as no one at work, church, school, or our community knows we have these problems, it should all work out ok. You see, that’s the lie Satan plants to keep us satisfied that we still have it all under control. Remember, God’s opinion ultimately is the most important, and if you are disobeying His guidelines for the way you treat others, you are sinning, PERIOD. Just because no one else seems to be observing the problem, doesn’t mean that they aren’t already picking up on the bad vibes. People aren’t that stupid, friend! Your spouse and children have body language and many other non-verbal means of communicating to the world that you are not treating them well, even when they are trying to hide their embarrassing secret.
I came from an abusive background and I didn’t turn out so bad. I’m not nearly as bad as my dad/mom. Are you kidding? The very fact that your own family is repeating the same nightmare in another generation is a serious problem. What if your children’s relationships turn out to be even worse than your parents’, just because you failed to deal with it in your own life? Yes, it’s serious. Don’t grade yourself on a curve against others who you perceive are/were worse than you are. Examine your life against God’s standard in His Word, and make whatever changes you need to make to live a life pleasing to Him! Proverbs says that when a person’s ways please the the Lord, He makes even that person’s enemies to be at peace with him/her. Righteousness and a truly right heart will positively, even miraculously, affect your ability to get along well with others. It is truth.
I don’t feel well. My health issues make me moody and my family knows it. Yes, they certainly do know it, and they resent being the brunt of your frustration. And if you want their prayers, love, understanding, and support, you will try harder not to let your personal pain affect your treatment of them. The best way to have someone actually on your side is not to turn him or her into an enemy by being an ogre!
I’m just talking mean to him/her. Since I’m not name-calling or using foul language, it’s not really verbal/emotional abuse. Baloney, friend. You are not that deceived! If the way you are speaking and behaving is causing abnormal fears, manipulation, torment, sadness, depression, suicidal thoughts, resentment, self-hatred, depreciation, insults, you are not behaving like Jesus! Yes, sometimes we have to address issues in our homes. Things need discussed, resolved, debated, corrected, at times changed for the better of everyone involved. Sometimes we must be iron sharpening iron…you may be instrumental in discipline in your home, but you are not called to be a verbal axe-wielder in your home. You can have even serious, somber, firm discussions with others without stepping into a spirit of strife. Weigh every action and word against how Jesus would handle what you’re handling, and if you are emotionally scarring another person, you need to stop it, NOW.

Initiating Change Through Prayer and Honest Self-Examination

There’s no way I can possibly cram all the helpful elements to enhancing our spousal relationships into this little blog post, but what I will do is this: I have included a couple of prayers for spouses whose anger issues are jeopardizing their marriages. I am proposing not anger management, but anger crucifixion! It’s time to take these issues to the cross, once and for all.

I do want to say this, as we end on a positive note: today is a new day. We can repent and apologize for the sins of our past, and start from this day forward to make better choices. I so respect Larry and Tiz Huch, television ministers, for their very transparent testimony of how God restored their marriage after years of abusive behavior. We need to see more testimonies like theirs of couples who’ve overcome the past, forgiven, and gone on to have happy marriages. I want you to know that there is hope for you too–but you must be willing to fight the real enemy, the devil, for it! God is ready to meet you right where you are, and His grace is sufficient.

Husbands – “Heavenly Father, I feel the pressure on every side to be in charge. The hardest time I have holding it together is when I come home, because that’s where I want most to be able to be myself. But Lord, I don’t like the man I see myself become when I’m around my family. Forgive me for the horrible way I have let my anger leech into my homelife. As the spiritual leader of our home, it says that I have spiritual issues of my own which need dealt with. Lord, I don’t want to damage my children for future relationships! I don’t want my wife to secretly despise me. The truth is, I don’t know how to change and without Your help, I can’t change. I ask You, in Jesus’ name, to break off any generational curses of parental and spousal abuse from my bloodline now. Sever all negative ties between my family history and my own immediate family now. If there is abuse in our lineage, let my family be the generation in which it is stopped. Lord, shine the light of Your Word into my spirit man. Chase the wickedness out of the corners of my soul where it loves to hide. Father, if there is an indwelling of any unclean spirit in me or on me which influences me to verbally, emotionally, or physically abuse my wife and children, I resist it now. I submit myself to You because Your Word says that if I will humble myself, submit to you, and resist the devil, he MUST flee from me! Drive out every evil spirit that influences me to harm others and to harm myself. Fill me up to overflowing with Your Holy Spirit and help me to recognize all open doors to evil in my life. I go behind Your revelation of these things and I shut them, one by one. In Jesus’ name, may every legal access the devil has to our home be deadbolted shut now and forevermore. Father, as I repent and submit myself to Your Word, I will also repent to and before my family for the wrong things I have said and done to them. Your Word says that anger rests in the bosom of fools. I don’t want to be a fool. I want to love my family the way You do, and to protect my spouse the way Christ shields and covers His Church. If I cannot see substantial changes coming, I will be man enough to initiate marital counseling. I will not hide our problems behind the guise of a Christian home, but I will get help and I will stop the abuse from perpetuating to another generation. Help me to love like You love. Thank You for forgiving me and extending Your grace and mercy over our situation now.”

Wives – “Heavenly Father, You have heard my silent cries for help, and I know that it is not Your plan for my family to be harboring this ugly secret. Verbal and physical abuse are not attributes of the Spirit-filled! These ugly manifestations have no place in our home. I look to You for wisdom to be able to be the thermostat of our home. While it is not right for my husband to abuse me, I know that I need to recognize “triggers” that provoke outbursts. I can’t always prevent bad moods and temper flares from occurring, but You can enable me to divert certain situations before they even occur. Lord, forgive me for times when I nag or boss or belittle my husband. Forgive me for sometimes not resisting the urge to push his buttons by inserting a little dig or subtle insult into discussions. While it is wrong for him to mistreat me, it is equally wrong for me to dare him to do so. I will set a watch upon the words of my mouth. I will learn to give soft answers that turn away wrath, and I will set in motion a spiritual mood change in our home through praise and worship, thanksgiving, prayer, reading and speaking Your Word aloud, and through the cleansing of evil spirits from my household in intercession! Help me to proactive in this area. Help me to build up my husband’s spirit man and not to tear him down. I repent of every time I have emasculated him through open insults, rebellion, and belittling him in front of others–especially our children. Help me to have new-found respect for him, and help me to forgive. Oh, Lord, how I need Your help there! Cause my moods to come into harmony in ways that affect his moods more positively. Your Word says that my lifestyle has the power to win him over to You just by the witness I live before him! No amount of preachiness or nagging could ever influence him like seeing Your love pour out of me. Help me to identify characteristics in my personality which might cause arguments (complaining, griping, negative words, insults, sarcasm, bossiness), and to put these things on the altar for good! Make me that kind of woman, Father, so full of Your Holy Spirit that he cannot resist the pull toward You. I will apologize to him for my shortcomings, and I will take the high road to reconcile whenever we have disagreements. I will not assume that he can read my mind! If I have concerns, I will speak gently to him about them and allow Your Holy Spirit to convict him in those areas. Lord, I ask You in Jesus’ name to break generational curses that come into our family from my side of the bloodline. Whether emotional disorders, addictions, abuse or being enslaved by those who abuse, or any other trap of Satan to perpetuate damage into our children, I stop it now by submitting our heritage to You! Doors that You have made me responsible to shut, I will close. I will set no wicked thing before my eyes, and I will not entertain the foolish advice of a broken world on how to conduct my household affairs! I look to You, O God, and I pray that, should our marriage require counseling, that You will pair my husband and me with the right counselor(s) who can help us to heal and move forward. And please, if remaining in our home is endangering the safety and well-being of myself and our children–if You see that my spouse is unwilling to be helped and will go on harming us–give me the discernment and courage to know when and where to flee for protection. In Jesus’ name I ask, Amen!”

Prayer Confession Over Anxiety

I am sitting down in Your presence, Papa God, spending the night with my Most High God. I am pressing in close to You–close as I can possibly get. I’m Your little shadow–right under Your wing! I say to You, “Abba, You’re my refuge. I trust in You and I’m safe!”

That’s right…and even now, I thank You for rescuing me from hidden traps, shielding me from deadly hazards. Your huge outstretched arms are protecting me— under them I AM perfectly safe; Your arms fend off all harm. YOU LOVE ME AND I’M CERTAIN OF IT!

I will fear nothing—not wild wolves in the night, not flying arrows (or bad news, or big bills, or negative doctors’ reports, or money worries, or even family drama) in the daytime. None of these things will cause me to lose my peace and not one ounce of sleep!

I’m not affected by fear of disease that prowls through the darkness, nor of disaster that erupts at high noon. When the enemy does his worst, YOU WILL DO YOUR BEST! When he tries to flood me with despair, YOU are my floodwall of protection and YOU ARE SHUTTING THE FLOODGATE ON DESPAIR! I am safe until the torrent subsides.

Even though others succumb all around, drop like flies right and left, no harm will even graze me. I am standing untouched, watching it all from a distance, I watch the wicked turn into corpses, watching it on tv news, yet not being a part of it. I DON’T FEAR THAT THOSE SAME THINGS WILL HAPPEN TO ME!

Yes, Papa, because You are my refuge, the High God my very own home, evil can’t get close to me, harm can’t get through the door. You’ve ordered Your angels to guard me wherever I go…and that’s just what they’re doing! Even if I would stumble, they’ll catch me; their job is to keep me from falling. Thank you, Papa God, for having my back (and all the rest of me) covered!

There may be feisty young lions and cunning serpents lying in wait on my pathway, but You’re keeping me safe. I walk safely along just as though they’re not even there…and if they try to attack, You’re empowering me to just kick them out of my path. I will treat them as the nuisance that they are and nothing more. They will not break my spirit and they will not break my stride.

Abba, You’ve said, “If you’ll hold on to Me for dear life, I’ll get you out of any trouble. I’ll give you the best of care if you’ll only get to know and trust me. Call Me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times; I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party. I’ll give you a long life, give you a long drink of salvation!”

Well, that’s just what I’m doing! Thank You for getting me out of trouble, for giving me the best of care as I strive to know and trust You more. Thank You for always answering when I call, for staying right with me through thick and thin. Thank You for rescuing me and then making me feel celebrated and special…because I’m Your child and I know You love me! Thank You for quality of life, a satisfied life, and a perfect salvation which will last me all of eternity.

I am taking a deep breath now and breathing in LIFE. I receive Your Holy Spirit with every breath! I am exhaling and pushing out every negative thought. I expel any thoughts that would crowd my mind from the knowledge that YOU are in control. I clear my soul of any problem that tries to look as tall and strong as my Lord Jesus! Any idea that violates my peace, any thought that would cause me to doubt that YOU are Sovereign, I arrest, handcuff, bind, toss into jail and throw away the key!
In Jesus’ name, anxiety has no more control over my life!

(Adapted into a prayer from Psalm 91:1-16 Message and KJV translations; and also from Isaiah 59:19, John 20:22 and 2 Corinthians 10:5)

Bamboo Bicycles or Real Revival?

Remember watching Gilligan’s Island on tv, the episodes where Professor would rig up an invention to make their Crusoe-esque lives a little easier? My favorite is “Gilligan-powered” ingenuity. Gilligan is seated on a bamboo bicycle, those skinny legs pedaling furiously to generate electricity for a radio transmitter, or to agitate a paddle wheel in a washtub full of dirty laundry, etc.

In the Body of Christ, are we pedaling bamboo bicycles to generate power? Are we mobilizing programs solely on our own strength and ambition–or even worse, based on someone else’s perceived success in harnessing revival?

We are so trend-driven when it comes to our faith, and it ought not be. It’s one thing to come away inspired by someone else’s encounter with God; but we are more than a little foolish if we think there’s some magic formula for revival, soul-winning, and restoring miracles in the Church. We saw in the 60’s and 70’s a variation of this. If Apostle so-and-so wore porkchop sideburns and he had a following, suddenly all the up-and-coming young ministers grew big goofy sideburns. They held the mic the same way he did. Pulled their lapels wayyyy out. They parted their hair on the same side, mimicked his vocal inflections, got the walk down just-so. If the evangelist had people fall out when he laid hands on them, now all the young hopefuls wanted everyone at the altar to fall out for them too! Yep, I’ve had a couple of them try to tip me over when I didn’t fall out on my own.

I’m not trying to mock our Pentecostal heritage, not at all. I celebrate it and walk in the gifts and baptismal measure of the Holy Spirit. Looking throughout the Bible, and throughout church history, however, it looks like every generation has had its bamboo bicycles on deserted islands where the power connection didn’t quite reach. Perhaps it’s not so much laziness on our part, but not actually knowing that we can have our own encounter without having to do it like so-and-so’s church, like Reverend Powerhouse, or like our godly role models. We do want the fire to fall; but we are looking in the wrong direction, hoping someone else to our left or right has perfected the template–hoping some else’s proven method will save us from having to seek God’s revelation for our own prayer and fasting model. We are trying to house the Holy Spirit in recycled plastic milk jugs instead of paying the price to become stretchable wineskins ourselves. We will try on someone else’s armor only to find out it’s too big and bulky for our own frames.

Consider this: although God changes not, He will never make Himself known to us through a boilerplate format for the encounter. When we copy someone else’s method, even if it works for that movement and season, for us it becomes dead works. And if we don’t move with the cloud by day and the fire by night, what DID once work for us will suddenly become dead works, too. How many times has the Body of Christ failed the test when the Lord called us to follow him out of a particular season on to another level? God is never going to share His glory with man. Yes, once He has moved on, we are perfectly free to stay where we are; program it up, to try to keep it all going just as before. He’ll let us. He just won’t be the source generating the energy. He will never prosper our attempts to bottle and patent and copyright His glory!

Not every church is going to be a Brownsville. Brownsville can’t even afford to be labeled a ‘Brownsville-style movement;’ for such a label has the potential to become a judgment against us. If we are blessed to have God’s visitation in a phenomenal, supernatural season, and He chooses to move us out of our oasis and back on the travel path again, there’s great danger in choosing to try to remain in the move that He’s finished anointing. I believe, and I say this with fear and great respect, that even the leaders of these great awakenings which have birthed in these last few years would tell you to keep your eyes on Jesus alone, listening to His directive–and stop trying to market a particular style of worship as being the “next new thing.” If we are blessed to be under the deluge of His outpouring, and His power should suddenly moves in a different direction; or, if we are trying furiously to bring someone else’s revival recipe to our own little corners on the globe, then we’ll just be pedaling our little bicycles like madmen, doomed to fail in our human frailty! God’s will is that all of us have a supernatural encounter with Him; but we don’t get to define the parameters for that encounter. He may manifest as wind in one setting, as rain in another, as fire in yet another, or He may manifest as that still small voice. If it’s from HIM, all of it is good! It’s HIS prerogative to define the visitation; it’s our mandate to be merely, get this, obedient.

I’ve heard some irreverent commentary even in the Body, where this or that particular movement would be rumored to be taken in error in spite of at least a timed visitation from God. Frankly, it hurts my feelings, for I believe these visitations have been very real at least as long as we have remained under God’s directive. I don’t know each individual situation, nor do I want to; but after the rumors of mighty revival movements collapsing or “fizzling out,” suddenly a teaching emerged which warned of the dangers of strange fire. Then the Body of Christ became scared of any manifestation of the Holy Ghost being labeled strange fire, and so we went back to having no fire. Neither of those polar positions is God’s intent for us individually or corporately. I’m not even sure I fully understand what constitutes “strange fire,” but I do know that if something ventures beyond Christ alone, its fruit will not and cannot remain.

I would challenge us all today to radical obedience. Obedience, not as weighed against the methods of others; but drowning out the popular theories of church growth, and getting somewhere alone with the Lord to hear what HE would have us do in order to release that anointing in our lives, in our churches, over our geographical areas. Obedience to GOD, not a new 7-step bullet point program for stirring up an awakening.

Jesus scolded Peter for worrying about John getting an easier ticket to heaven than he was getting. Jesus as much as said, “John’s encounter with me is not your business, Peter. Follow ME.” Peter didn’t want that place of being led where he didn’t want to go, to that untimely demise, that suffering, persecution, that upside-down cross. If John’s encounter involves an easier burden–if it were to be perceived that John has more favor or is looked upon by the other 12 as holier–Peter is jealous for THAT encounter. We can’t busy ourselves with what works in Australia, in Pensacola, or in the big new church on the other side of town with a coffee shop and valet parking. Praise God for moving in such notable ways in those places; we rejoice for them! We will buy their worship tapes, listen to the preaching on our CD’s, read the books and let the zeal for the house rub off on us, too–but our job is still to look to GOD ALONE for our own visitation, whatever that visitation should look like for us. I can almost guarantee that it’s going to look a lot different here in the foothills of Appalachia than it does in Sydney, than it did at Mezuzah Street or at Murphy, NC. But…if God’s the one generating the power, we won’t have to build a single program or training center to keep it going.

Obey the Lord, pure and simple. He will not let it be said that the success of His Body comes from the neck down! Know this: if you obey Him only, instead of trying to power your own movement, you will never ever be in danger of deception. You won’t have strange fire, and you won’t have no fire. You will have HIS fire. And you won’t have to grow sideburns or pedal a bamboo bike! Just saying…

The Cheerfulness of Obedient, Smart Giving

We have an abundance of “smart” electronics these days, don’t we? Smart phones. Smart cars. They weren’t designed to keep us from having to actually be smart, though! I’m talking today about giving, and how we can give intelligently by giving OBEDIENTLY.

There’s really a difference, you know. The difference is the fruit that is borne from the seed we sow. Generosity is a noble and wonderful trait (the Bible says for us to be givers!) when it works in tandem with obedience to God. We should indeed be cheerful and liberal givers; but it’s doubly important that we listen for God’s instructions, because foolish generosity is, well, FOOLISH. The whole of that text says this (I love the Voice Translation of 2 Cor. 9:7): Giving grows out of the heart—otherwise, you’ve reluctantly grumbled “yes” because you felt you had to or because you couldn’t say “no,” but this isn’t the way God wants it. For we know that “God loves a cheerful giver.” When our giving is God-directed, it is smart giving; obedient giving which isn’t given for ulterior motives, or given out of guilt or compulsion or a need to just feel good!

A generous parent, for instance, can harm his or her child through excessive giving not tempered by wisdom. Would you give your child candy for breakfast just because he or she wants it? Of course not! But would you breed a materialistic appetite in your child by enabling him or her to get every single thing the child wants, just for the asking? Do you operate in fear of not being your child’s friend, when in reality, your child needs you to set boundaries, to say no once in a while? Following God’s direction will keep perfect balance instead of making the child entitled, spoiled, selfish, wasteful. You can actually TEACH your child by anointed example as you give wisely. This applies in every area of our lives, not just parenting! Sometimes we have to say no to ourselves! I know I sure do! Read on.

Remember the song, “What a Friend We Have In Jesus?” Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer…

That familiar verse perfectly sums up our lives when we don’t listen for His voice! Yes, it’s true. We’ve gotten used to just asking for things…perhaps we need to return to asking for Him to reveal His will in decisions we are facing. It even applies to our giving of our time, talent, and treasure. I know all too well what it’s like to give just because it feels good. The importance however goes beyond my flesh feeling good, and therefore, my motivation must have a higher purpose than gratifying my flesh!

How can one be a selfish giver, you might ask…sounds like an oxymoron! It’s taken and is still taking time and experience, and also a deeper knowledge of my Lord through intimate relationship, to know that responsibility accompanies our ability to say yes. My ability to say NO has in times past gotten me into trouble. Hey Lisa, can you join this club? Can you go here and do that and can you be available at all hours for anything anyone asks? Oh yeah…I’ve been so bogged down with to-do’s which I agreed to in order to be a people pleaser. Then, exhausted, I would find myself bitter at having no downtime, or nothing at all left. Often, I’ve had not one piece of fruit to show for it, because I didn’t have the courage to say, “I’ll get back to you…I really need to talk to God before I commit to this!”

Well, go back to the passage in the Bible where Saul took the spoils of war after God had specifically told him not to…and then he tried to appease God by sacrificing some of the livestock on altars to justify his disobedience of a direct order! Talk about insulting God’s omniscience! The Scriptures tell us that obedience is better than sacrifice. Saul’s disobedience would eventually cost him his kingdom…even his descendants would suffer consequences because of his foolishness. We ourselves can undo all the good of our generosity whenever we sidestep what God has already instructed. Why would we not take the counsel of the One Who actually KNOWS the outcome? When we have His voice, we already have the inside track to what is going to be a blessing, be blessed, and bear fruit!

Bear in mind, He will sometimes direct us to give when it DOESN’T have that euphoric, how-wonderful-it-feels effect! Can we respond when there’s a need in our own life? Can we be as the widow who cooks her last meal for the prophet before there’s evidence we will have enough for ourselves? Don’t stop being generous, for heaven’s sake…but lay your heart and your feelings on the altar and allow Him to direct you to good ground. Even good ground can’t produce its best yield if you cram the seeds too closely together! Give your acts of kindness the best chance for a harvest by being sensitive to the Holy Spirit. Instead of it just being said that you’d give someone the shirt off your back, let it be said that you heard from God and responded with the right thing at the right time!

“In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.” Proverbs 3:6 (AMP)

Confidence—in HIM

“But this beautiful treasure is contained in us—cracked pots made of earth and clay—so that the transcendent character of this power will be clearly seen as coming from God and not from us.” (2 Corinthians 4:7 VOICE)

One of the cruelest vampires leeching the life right out of you is lack of confidence. When I think of how many years I had let the approval of people imprison me and hold me back, it just sickens me…so I try even harder NOT to think of it! Seriously, it is paralyzing when you need affirmation. The devil will use that longing as a tool against you–always putting satisfaction just beyond your reach, always keeping you self-deprecating and in a state of the fear of not being good enough. Yes, that was me. And my imagination was in overdrive…thinking people didn’t really like me, didn’t think I was good enough, thinking I was going to mess up. So I approached everything timidly. What a setup for failure and more bruising to my fragile ego! I would watch other people do things so easily (especially public speaking and singing) and think, “why can’t I be like them?” You know what this does? It makes us avoid situations where we might be asked to shine!

How funny it is, that it’s taken me hitting my mid-late forties to shake that stronghold. Sure, we tend to chill out a little more as we settle into getting older; but may I tell you that the REAL act of liberation came when I stopped keeping my eyes on others and started focusing on Jesus. When I surrendered that need for approval to Him, and learned that His was truly the only approval I needed, something changed. I began even to cast down imaginations and subdue everything to the knowledge of WHO JESUS is, and I realized that I don’t have to please anyone but Him. I also learned that when we keep our eyes on Him, He does the rest THROUGH us. I can’t rely on my own strength and ability to be there every single time…but you know what? I can always expect HIS to be!

If you are struggling with confidence issues, talk to your Papa God about it. He can heal fears, emotional/physical abuse, wounded egos, and bitter disappointment…and can free you to step out and grasp that thing He’s created you to do. Indwelling of the Holy Spirit (ask Him to fill you if you’ve not experienced this) will unleash boldness.

I love the Apostle Paul. He had an education and life experience that any man would be proud to flaunt, yet he kept it to himself. Why? Nothing to prove! He came into Christianity fully aware that he would be distrusted, rejected by many for the years prior when he’d made it his life’s work to persecute followers of Jesus. He knew some might never accept him as good enough. Did it slow him down? No! Why? Nothing to prove!

My lifelong friend Jimmy Copley, a bold carrier of the Good News, made a FB post today which really cemented this point I’m making. He likened us to pizza boxes. The box isn’t what has worth–the pizza inside is. Be filled today with the Holy Spirit. People will smell the aroma and become hungry for what’s inside. The writing on the outside of the box, the fancy construction OR LACK THEREOF…irrelevant. You ARE a fragile vessel, capable of failing, messing up, falling short…yet THE GOD has chosen to use your frail container in which to place His Spirit! He does this so that when He works through you, people will know that it’s Him and not your own ability to perform which has brought forth good things.

Today when you are about your daily routine, you will be called upon to do something greater than your ability and experience can offer. If you are relying on merely those two factors, you may set yourself up for failure. Ask God to take your container, imperfect and incomplete though you may be, and work things through you that exceed your capabilities. As He does, give Him the glory. No more fixating on the judges’ scorecards! GOD Himself endorses you! With your confidence in His ability (the One Who cannot fail) instead of your own (which may or may not succeed), you walk into your situation with the full assurance that you really CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens you. Like Paul…nothing to prove, so you can afford to be all in. Go forth empowered today, in Jesus’ name!

Quietly Comes Our Rescuer

The Lord said to Elijah, “Go, stand in front of me on the mountain, and I will pass by you.” Then a very strong wind blew until it caused the mountains to fall apart and large rocks to break in front of the Lord . But the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind, there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake, there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. After the fire, there was a quiet, gentle sound. 1 Kings 17:11-12 NCV

I wonder how often when, faced with difficult situations, we imagine that God’s method of coming against our circumstances will be to “outdo” the noise of the enemy’s onslaught? Do we have expectations of Him suddenly becoming loud, boisterous, angry, violent, ostentatious as He rises to our rescue? What if we were to miss His visitation by overlooking the quiet, gentle sound that follows all the hoopla?

This particular passage of Scripture is intriguing to me, within and outside of its context. Elijah had hit a spiritual crisis after his Mount Carmel moment. The prophet who’d called down fire from heaven was now running scared from a wicked ruler who vowed to kill him. In his despair, Elijah perceived himself to be the “only one left,” and he expressed his feelings of frustration and utter aloneness to God. God revealed to him Who He is, by revealing to Elijah what He isn’t!

Now, God’s ways are so above our own, I don’t presume to know why He decided to appear to Elijah thus. We know that in some other Bible stories, the Lord did appear in a loud and frightening fashion; and yet, this particular time, His quietness was a stark contrast to the roar of what preceded Him.

All that we ever need to place our trust in is His sheer faithfulness. What He has promised in His Word, He will bring to pass. If we try to predict or even manipulate His method of coming to our rescue, we will go chasing every wild and sensational “noise” around us. How many people out there simply cannot bear not to be in the loop…and they step beyond the boundaries God has set. We see scores of people nowadays flocking to mediums and psychics to give them a “when” and a “how;” and practices which are despicable to a holy God are increasingly gaining popularity on television. Those who seek rogue answers to what He has not yet chosen to reveal operate in the polar opposite of faith: fear. Fear can drive one to the point of rebellion against the only One Who can truly help. We can never sidestep our Creator and get a good result! Knowing our fascination with appearances, the enemy is more than willing to send his deceptions to us in the big, bold, underscored—and most of all, instantaneous— “signs” that we seek. Oh, how we need to clear our heads of our expectations and just WAIT ON THE LORD.

Our Father has granted access, through His Son, for us to approach His throne boldly in our time of need! Even when our feelings are carnal, fearful, flawed, doubtful, or angry, He allows us to pour our hearts out to Him. As we invite Him into our every day lives, and develop relationship with Him through daily interaction, we also establish the deep mutual trust that enables us to communicate honestly with God. It is that regular communication that enlightens us to His nature. That regular communication also teaches us to know that God doesn’t react. He responds. He responds to FAITH.

Don’t forfeit your miracle because it appears to be too simple to be from the Lord! God doesn’t have to prove Himself bigger than our problems, stronger than our enemy. He doesn’t fight noise with more noise. When you are in a bad situation, and the chaos is deafening, you may surmise that He will show up in a big booming voice and command the storm to be still. That’s not the way He does it! When we read of Jesus calming the storm, it doesn’t say that He screamed out, “Peace, be still!” He spoke it. There was no alarm in His voice, no argumentative tone. It wasn’t the WAY He said it; rather, it was WHO said it.

You may be in dire straits today, heart pounding from anxiety. You may be looking at a clock or calendar, a financial statement or a medical report which demands something you can’t give. Your child may have gotten into some trouble that can’t be negotiated away. You may love someone who has fallen into addiction’s cruel trap, and it may make you feel powerless to help. You may even feel like crying out, “God, where ARE You?!!” Stop where you are. Take a deep breath. If tears need to fall, let them fall. He is touched by the feeling of your infirmities! Hebrews 4:15 Says it like this: “For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.” The word for infirmities in the Greek is astheneiais…and it encompasses more than mere physical impairment. It is defined as feebleness (of mind or body); by implication, malady; morally, frailty — disease, infirmity, sickness, weakness. Whatever area of your mind or body contains a frailty, He has it covered because He’s been there, done that! Because Jesus survived the experience without failing His Father, you too have hope. Think of Mary, who, after lamenting her brother Lazarus’ untimely death and Jesus’ absence, counters her emotional outburst with profound faith: “I know, Lord, that EVEN NOW, even after it’s too late in the natural to reverse what has happened, You can raise him from the dead!”

Pray with me: “Heavenly Father, You know all things already, so I stand before you without pretense. You see my dilemma. (Go ahead, be specific with the Lord now about what’s troubling you.) Your Word tells me that You are all-knowing. You also know that when the tempter attacks me in weak areas, the struggle to remain strong is more difficult. I roll my works over onto You now. I surrender my desire to fix what’s wrong by my own might…I already know it’s beyond my ability, but I also surrender that “need” to be in control. No man can pluck out of Your hand what’s been committed to Your care, so I cast my cares in this situation upon You now. I receive Your help. I allow You to lift my shoulder from the burden! I allow You to do what You know needs to be done in order to make right what is wrong. Whatever You require of me, I determine to be obedient. If You say that I must change something about myself, my habits, my associations, my affections, I surrender those to You as well. If You should will to change ME instead of overtly changing my situation, then I ask for Your grace to embrace change, knowing that all things work together for good if I love You and am called according to Your purpose. Thank You for hearing me. Thank You for even those times when You answer in a quiet, unheralded way. Your answer may not be noisy and big and grandiose…but I eagerly await the “Peace, be still,” if You should choose to merely whisper the remedy and bring it to pass! I commit to wait upon You, to trust and to faint not. Whatever You choose to do, please take Your liberty now, in Jesus’ name.”